You
know I was almost about to give up, thinking that you never connected the way I
did. I thought I was creating an unnecessary world of illusion for myself. And then
like a miracle I came across this wonderful inspirational interview of Vishen lakhiani on you tube. I could
just relate to him so much. He said “reality is nothing but a malleable
illusion”: we can bend reality by creating our own visions and believing them
to happen. He also said “don’t worry about ‘how’
your dreams come to you, just ask for them and believe they’ll come”. This gave
such a boost to my dying spirit. He also spoke of the significance of ESP [extra
sensory perception] and the power of the alpha state of the subconscious mind.
ESP is something I have been experiencing since childhood and so after
listening to his speech my belief in it got strengthened.
There
is another paranormal thing that happened to me. I dare to share with you coz I
know it’s only you who will understand, rest will laugh it off am sure. Yesterday
in the wee hours of the dawn I had a dream, I heard you calling my name and as I
turned around a spider crawled upon me. Dreams are the road to unconscious and
there’s nothing more powerful than the unconscious mind: I believe this and it’s
established as well. Morning when I got up I immediately started writing this
and you won’t believe while I am writing this I see a spider crawling on the
wall facing opposite to me!!! Now you must be wondering what a spider has to do
with all this. Since the past few months I have been closely associated with
nature and it was the only source of spiritual guidance and messages. I did
everything as per the guidance of the divine through nature, starting from
connecting to you telepathically to writing. Trust me writing was a long lost
creativity which I realised recently until a spider came my way. It was 3
months back when I wanted you to know what I feel for you [but not through the
conventional way]. It was during these moments of contemplation that a strange
spider [very rare to sight] crawled into my room, it crawled on my pen and
books. I was afraid of it but at the same time I was intrigued by its
mysterious presence. Then what next? I immediately resorted to my best friend:
Google Search. As I googled I came across some articles on spider totem, the
spiritual medicine of spider, shamanism etc. I was enthralled about was I read
about spiders. It said spiders visit you when you are at heights of creativity.
Spiders visit those who create magic through their words and make their dream
come true. Spider is symbolic of patience, feminine energy, magic, creativity
and communication. And that’s how I started writing thinking you’ll connect [and
I am sure u did, though silently], thinking my words will create magic [get you
into my life]. Even when I stopped writing to you few days back, trust me
spiders started visiting me again, coaxing me to start writing again [and the
result I am writing now].
I
was being impatient [I am not as patient as you are], trying to find physical
proof of my experiences. I didn’t understand that the right time hasn’t come
yet. However I am happy I have found you and now I am trying to gather patience
as much as I can: waiting for you is worth it, you are my twin soul. You are
the one that captures my attention and captivates me silently, yet steadily
into his hypnotic web. You are the one who gives me such a sense of security
and honesty, despite the fact that I haven’t seen you, spoken to you nor have
known you!!! No one else can match up to
you and that’s why I say you are worth waiting for.
The
mysterious connections that existed between both of us can’t be false, the
subtle clues that you gave me can’t be meaningless, why am I not able to take
you off my mind?, why does that recurrent, irritating gut feeling tells, you
will come, why is this uncanny feeling that you too are searching for me and
are going through everything that I am writing? Why is this strong feeling that
I already know you and you are the one I was searching for? Even when I am not
writing my mind is connected to you and I feel you are there.
Now
I am taking a huge leap, the leap of
faith, I’ll not break, I’ll patiently wait till the day comes when our
silence will no more speak, it will be our eyes that will speak. I believe that the divinity will bring
you to me for you shall never remain untouched by my passion and devotion for
you. It’s my faith that will make this miracle happen, I don’t know how, but
the miracle will happen for sure. I know you are just like me, you’ll never
settle with someone until and unless you find what you are searching for. My quest
is over and yours will be over the day you meet me. And to you all that I can
say is I am waiting for you, ready to face the challenges of life with
you.
